HOW TO BECOME A REPUBLICAN 1. PREACH THE BIBLE (BUT DONT FOLLOW IT)
2. HATE GAYS (EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE MANY IN OUR PARTY BUT ITS OKAY THERE REPUBLICANS)
3. FOLLOW THE CONSTITUTION ( BUT AMMEND IT TO SERVE OUR PURPOSE)
4. SCOWL ON ABORTION ( BUT BUSH IS PRO CHOICE JUST DONT TELL)
5. FEED THE HUNGRY , HOUSE THE HOMELESS (PSSSST BUT CUT ALL THE PROGRAMS AND SCREW THEM)
6. TELL THE TROOPS THERE DOING THE RIGHT THING ( BUT DONT TELL THEM THE TRUTH ABOUT NOTHING )
7. OH AND IF YOU SEE OSAMA THANK HIM HES OUR MAN
WHAT HAS GW DONE RIGHT! WHAT IS HIS GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT................BEING A DIVIDER NOT A UNITER...........NOT GETTING BIN LADEN DEAD OR ALIVE...................GOING INTO IRAQ BLOWING UP HALF THE COUNTRY, KILLING INNOCENT IRAQI'S, ALMOST 5,000 YOUNG AMERICANS KILLED AND NOT FINDING WMD'S..........(BRING IT ON)............NOW THERE'S A RECORD TO BE PROUD OF.................THERE'S A RECORD ANY GOOD CONVERSATIVE CAN FOLLOW...........AS LONG AS YOU GET YOUR TAX CUTS....................THAT IS...........SAD AND SICKENING...................OH YEAH AND THEN THERE'S HE'S THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN KEEP AMERICA SAFE..............THAT'S THE BIGGEST INSULT OF ALL.............
If the U.S. were in a global popularity contest, we'd probably come in last. This is terrible news, according to the liberal media. (But I repeat myself. "Liberal media" is redundant, much like "poor student.")
Well, here's the real news. Greatness must never be confused with popularity. And the protected always bemoan the protector.
So: It's our job to be great. Just don't expect gratitude.
How to become a Dumcrap:
1. Pray to Obama. He is the new messiah because he is such a great speaker. Much like the Nazis felt about Hitler.
2. If you're gay, hate everyone that doesn't agree with your agenda. Preach tolerance while you are intolerant of people who don't agree with your liberal "anything goes" lifestyle.
3. Agree that the killing of unborn fetuses is somehow a good thing, but fight like hell to save a tree. How f%$ked up is that?
4. Sit back and wait for a government handout. The rich owe you. It's all their fault!
5. Sell the troops. We don't need the military. It is more important to be popular. Just ask Hollywood. They are the true moral authority.
6. Osama? If we catch him, we will let him go because he is no longer an "enemy combatant." The term doesn't exist anymore, plus we want to be popular with the Muslim world. And........if you think about it, 9/11 is our fault because we made them not like us.
So let's not be great, let's be POPular ;D
Leftist candidate Mauricio Funes has claimed victory in El Salvador's presidential election, in a historic vote that ends the 20-year rule of right-wing party ARENA.
"This was the happiest night of my life," Funes told reporters and supporters late on Sunday.
"Today, the citizenship that believed in hope and defeated fear has triumphed," Funes said.
"My government will be based on the spirit of national unity," Funes said.
WASHINGTON — Don't blame the Bush administration for all the country's economic problems.
That's the message from former Vice President Dick Cheney.
President Barack Obama constantly talks about the enormous economic troubles that he inherited when he took office in January. Cheney agrees that Obama did indeed came into power amid very difficult economic circumstances.
But Cheney says he doesn't think the Bush administration can be blamed for creating the economic woes. Cheney says it's a global financial problem. He says the idea that fault can assigned to the previous administration is "interesting rhetoric" but he doesn't think people care about that.
Cheney spoke on CNN's "State of the Union."